Contact needs careful planning: you must ensure the child remains safe and gets something positive from it. Safeguarding must remain paramount and you must follow the Care Plan.
Children and young people want to stay connected to key people in their lives. (Ref: Gilligan, 2001 p.29).
Such social networks are of key importance.
As a result of situations that have occurred there may or may not be the opportunity for rehabilitation, so it is always important to understand the meaning of 'the family' and 'family life' for the young person.
Often, especially where rehabilitation is not possible, there will be other people, frequently carers and young people, who will be important to them.
"I had that bond ... and now I get to see them for two hours every year. I don't know what's harder. I mean having somebody there and never seeing them, or somebody being dead ... When you know they're still out there it pisses you off so much."
"I don't know what's harder. I mean having somebody there and never seeing them, or somebody being dead ... "
(Ref: SCIE, Knowledge Review 5, 2004)
We'd like to introduce you now to a tool called a 'social network map'. You may find it useful and you may want to use it with the children and young people you work with.
First of all though we'd like you to try out a simplified version yourself:
1. Think about key figures in your life.
2. Look at the seven categories in the table on the right.
3. Write the names of these key figures (e.g. Bob, uncle) in the correct category in the table.
NOTE: You can only have a maximum of two key figures per category.
4. When you are finished, click on 'Next page' to see your completed social network map.
When using it with young people you might decide to use fewer categories at first and build up.
Considering your social network map, we'd like you to think about:
- Which of the people/pets/organisations is it important for you to keep in regular touch with?
- How often and when do you want to visit/see/hear from, write to/talk to them?
- In what ways do you want to communicate with them? (e.g. by phone/email/letters/cards/text/visits/going places together)
Completing this exercise will have helped you become more aware of all the relationships you have and the different ways you like to keep in touch.
You will see that your relationships are quite intricate and that you use a variety of ways of maintaining your contacts.
Why don't you try using a social network map with a child or young person to help them think about who they want to keep in touch with and how you can help them to do this? Make this a regular part of what you do with the young people you work with.
We have included a ready-to-use template in the Extra resources section (under 'Tools') that you can use with a child or young person you know.
Children often spend a lot of time thinking about their relationship with their family. Even if the child is not going home, it is important to help him or her maintain links that are helpful for them.
They often want more contact with fathers and other family members, such as grandmothers and siblings, as well as mothers, even if they are happy in their placement and do not want to return home.
Some want contact with particular family members and not with others, while other children prefer indirect to direct contact.
Different types of contact
There are many ways for children and young people to keep in touch with important people in their lives:
- emails
- letters
- texts
- going shopping together
- going to the cinema or watching a video
- going to a cafe or restaurant
- going to an exhibition or museum
- going to a sports event
- going for a walk
- going for a drive somewhere
- looking at photo albums together.
Use your imagination and knowledge of what the young person enjoys to make suggestions! (Ref: Gilligan, 2001)
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